Puneet Gupta

I have not met Puneet. I know him from his ‘newsletter days’; he would invite original poems and stories and publish them on to a web jornal. Here he is, creating something new. His maiden theatre production. We wish him success and innovation. – Kartikey Sehgal 

Puneet writes:

Trained to be an engineer from IIT (Delhi, India) and University of Maryland (USA), I never imagined that my life would take such a journey with arts. Though I was creative, the focus somehow always stayed on good grades and preparations for “settling down” in life. My first brush with theatre was at IIT Delhi. The medium caught my fancy and I aspired one day to be a part of something live and vibrant. My tryst with doing theatre started with small-length plays that I directed and acted in at college level, and the love affair was official.

Through the last decade, I have progressively tried different genres and styles of theatre – rough theatre, body theatre, ‘complete the story & improvisation theatre’ to script bound theatre – and each of them left me wanting for more. Interestingly, all this while, I have continued my engineering profession and have been able to quite successfully balance both my committments (honorably I think).

Over these years, I have toured for different productions with groups like Yours Truly Theatre and, recently, Evam Entertainment. I had directed a 10-minute sketch – Game Theory by Peter Sagal – which won applause from the audiences in Bangalore. I am now ready for my first professional outing (as a playwright and director) for a full length play “Snakes-n-Ladders” – an ode to the corporate lifestyle that many of us are only too familiar with. The play comes from the stable of Mad Hats Theatre (www.madhststheatre.in), a group of amateur and mostly first-timer theatre enthusiasts who are tyring to defy the perception that you need formal training to pull off a great play.

Besides theatre, my personal interests include oil painting, writing (fiction, poetry, plays), pottery, film-making and cooking… Stemming from my love for arts, I have co-founded a community called Slice of Life (www.slice-of-life.in) that aims to make art reach out to every one – in an inclusive and collective manner.

Ananth Venkatesh

I profess that there is immense admiration and fascination in me for Hinduism and for the many divinities that epitomize this faith.

The sacred books such as the Vedas, the Bhagavad Gita and many others provide this religion with its seductively cerebral foundations. The duration of the survival of these pious treatises illustrates their attachment to the psychology and mentality of the Indian State.

The gorgeousness of Hindu treatises is that their applicabilities is not confined to the Hindus alone. Sage standpoints are enshrined in the Bhagavad Gita, the Vedas, etc., which offer suggestions to the individual humans as regards apt and judicious fashions of administering and directing any human life. The advices of these visionary Hindu tomes are not exclusivist. None of these books have been awarded the most paramount position in the Hindu scriptural hierarchy.

The Bhagavad Gita is not exclusivist and does not speak ill of other religions. Photo Source

Christian and Islamic sacred books are defined, at times, by their inferences linking foreign religions to heathenism or incivility or unenlightenment or primitivism. The connotation – displeasingly – in certain pages of these books is that these uncouth foreign religions have to be Muslimized or Christianized with muscularity if necessary. One will struggle to find the same sinful intolerance in the Hindu texts such as the Bhagavad Gita and the Vedas and even the monumental Hindu epics like the Mahabharata and the Ramayana.

Also, the Gods and Goddesses of Hinduism represent sundry stories, lives and messages that have ample relevance for humankind today. The multifarious stories of Hindu deities thrill me to a beefy extent and are so pertinent in the modern world. Their pertinence will always remain.

My respect for Hinduism is unordinary probably as I have never really felt any attachment to the ‘specialty of the purity’ of Brahmanism. I never will.

I have regarded Brahmanic preeminence in ritualistic Hinduism as a concept that wholly mars the vast intellectual extraordinariness of Hinduism. Brahmanic absolute supremacy should be a concept that should be abolished by the Hindu society itself. The theological, cerebral and scriptural richness of Hinduism can survive even in the absence of outright Brahmanic ascendancy.

Brahmin: A person who is literate in Vedas and Vedic Science

Kshatriya – A person who protects and fight for the a kingdom/country

Vaishya – A person involved in running in trade, agriculture.

Shudra – A person who works for others.

From Here.

My cherished mission is to see comprehensive Hindu unity in India, which covers politics, culture and social order. This goal of unity cannot afford senseless, pejorative and preposterous caste hierarchies in Hindu society, which only assist the internal and external foes of Hinduism.

Thus, while I will unendingly venerate and propagate the mammoth knowledgeableness and visionariness of the Hindu faith, its epics, its books, its scriptures, etc, I will never be able to associate myself with the Brahmanic stream of Hinduism. Brahmanic presence may be kept at the same social level as that of other communities.

Vishwamitra (bearded) was not born as a Brahmin. His Brahminism was a result of his work. Photo Source  

On a more lighthearted note, another Hindu issue, which appeals to me immensely, is the issue of Hindu interlingual matrimony. The idea of a Rajasthani Hindu male wedding a Malayalam Hindu female seems such an enticing one. Of course, the Rajasthani man needs to be in a condition of romance for the Malayalam female and vice versa.

I visualize that it would be idyllic socially if interlingual matrimonies were run-of-the-mill affairs in India. But there is strong resistance in some Hindu quarters to the thought of interlingual/intercaste marriages between Hindus. This is simply detrimental to the extraordinary status of Hinduism in the Indian soul.

We need to reach a point where interlingual nuptial ceremonies between Hindus are par for the course. Even now, lamentably, there are Hindu parents, who hesitate to wed their daughters and sons to Hindus of another language. Isn’t this inexcusably senseless?

There are Hindu parents, who are unnerved on realizing that their daughter or son is in a romantic state for a Hindu of another linguistic community. For example, there would be some Hindu parents in Gujarat, who would baulk at the idea of making their son marry a Hindu Telugu female. The hesitation would be not because of the personality of the girl, which may be delightful, but because of her ‘Teluguness’.

Similarly, Tamil parents may worry on comprehending that their daughter has been smitten by a Punjabi Hindu male. The Punjabi boy may be a topaz as regards personality i.e. he may be a pleasant and responsible man. His parents may be immensely lovable. The Tamil girl and the Punjabi boy may have steady compatibility and will want to tie the knot. But the Tamil parents may exhibit procrastination as regards the marriage because of the Punjabiness of the boy. That he is also a part of the miscellaneous Hindu community is overlooked.

Such parents exist in every linguistic Hindu community. I hope that this nervousness about Hindu interlingual marriage vanishes one day in the future.

Inter-caste marriages are becoming increasingly common. Photo Source 

As regards me, I say that, if I am involved in an interlingual (love) marriage with a Hindu female (who is of Punjab or Kashmir or AP or Kerala or Maharashtra or Gujarat or Rajasthan or Karnataka or of other non-Tamil blocks), it would give me copious contentment for several reasons. I would feel that (what I am going to say now may seem heavy…..) I have played a tiny part in strengthening interlingual Hindu unity.

Obviously, I would also be happy that I married the female, for whom I had romance and respect, and who had love and esteem for me. I would be contented that I wedded a woman with whom I had fair compatibleness.

Also, I have to voice this. If I am in a state of love for a female of my linguistic community and the same sentiment is experienced by that female, obviously, matrimony would be one of the next steps for all intents and purposes.

In any case, I firmly feel that certain Hindus will have to gradually stop giving regal status to terms like Brahman, Yadav, Kayastha, Jat, Iyer, Thakur, Iyengar, Nadar, Shetty and Patel among others. This regal status cannot come at the cost of injury to overall Hindu cohesion, especially politically and as regards marital intermingling.

 Sikh-Rajput weddings have strengthened ties between the cultures and helped national integrity. Source

The inward-looking Hindus need to embrace interlingual Hindu marriages for the solid preservation of Hindu structure in the future. Also, they need to embrace it for the sake of sanity.

Another attitudinal transformation wanted in some Hindu minds desperately is the stoppage of female feticide/infanticide. This is a grisly act not worthy of mercy, especially considering the powerfulness of Hindu female divinity and the venerable status that they have in our religion.

May be… may be…… the paucity of interlingual Hindu marriages was one reason behind a mainly Hindu India being molested and disfigured by foreign religious forces in the past. The more comprehensively unified Hindus in India become, the better it would be for Hinduism’s durability here and for its ability to combat effectively mortal perils to its existence.

Shaival Thakkar

“India, on an average is a country which denies people the right to love. But love explodes on the screen.”

- Indian Cinema class notes, SAA, JNU

Ting ting ting ting ting ting
Ting ting ting ting ting ting

Ting ting ting ting ting ting
Ting ting ting ting ting ting

I might have missed out on some ‘ting tings’ but basically, this is the sound of Shahrukh Khan pretending to play a romantic hook on his mandolin and giving cheesy looks to Kajol and the Swiss Cow (video link) in Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge (DDLG). This is also the sound of the messed up subconscious of many young Indians’ idea of romantic love. Whether s/he is a Bollywood fan or not, the average Indian has watched this movie at least a couple of times. This movie tells you that to fall in love with a beautiful Indian girl; you need to make a trip to Europe! (This is very expensive or simply unaffordable for most of us!).

Swiss Cows after a screening of DDLJ. (source: Mandeep Goyal)

When I was in school, as a pastime in free periods, we would take a pencil and put it very quickly through the empty spaces between our fingers and see who could do that the fastest and most passionately. That’s a trick we picked up from Salman Khan’s movie ‘Love’ (1991) (which had the famous song ‘Sathiya yeh tune kya kiya’) where he does the same with a knife(!) as there are some major problems in his love life.

A typical Bollywood thing is for the hero to dance and sing around trees in order to impress the heroine. The average Indian guy cannot sing and dance as well as a Bollywood’s hero. And in case if he managed to get his girl to the nearest park or garden and tried dancing then he would probably be thrown out of the garden by a watchman with those huge scary wooden dandas!. And I don’t think any girl would be impressed by this non-sense. I don’t think even Mother Nature would approve of such antics. Imagine two trees in the Ramoji Film City having a conversation.

[Tree 1:”Man, I’d much rather have monkeys jumping up and down on my branches than these Bollywood actors dancing around my trunk.”
Tree 2: “True, all this singing and dancing business always gives me high blood pressure. I wish they’d do all that underwater or something. I’d much rather die and be turned into paper than live another day to see all this phony-baloney!”]

The Bollywood dance routine has pervaded foreign sanity. (source)

Thank God most of these song and dance sequences are shot abroad! We already have so much non-sense going on in India in terms of silly symbolic politics and lack of infrastructure, that it is a good idea to outsource these silly whimsical song and dance shoots to Switzerland and other such exotic locations.

In fact, I say that most of the Bollywood actors, actresses and directors should stay abroad as much as possible. It’s the next best thing to disowning them completely!! Imagine if I was the immigration officer at one of the airports where a Bollywood team has freshly arrived from a shoot. I would tell the whole bunch of them, “You guys are Bollywood people. Sorry your passports are not valid anymore. You are no longer citizens of India. We have made arrangements for you all to go to either Timbuktu or Antarctica, whichever place you think is more conducive to singing, dancing and stupidity.”

Sometimes, I imagine that in hell, the hottest cauldrons are reserved for Bollywood directors who exploit their audiences. Imagine Yamdoot saying, “Here Mr.XYZ, you can show me your ‘item song’ in this cauldron. It has been waiting for you since a long time.” Furthermore, Yamdoot says, “In your films you always put more emphasis on the beauty of the Indian woman’s physical and behavioural qualities. And you are always demeaning to the self respect of Indian men by making them dance around scantily clad women. You fool; do you know how your ‘item songs’ badly hamper the self-actualisation process of Indian men and women? My colleagues in heaven send beautiful women and men to earth for making love. And all you do is teach Indian men how to scare away lovely Indian women! You know the formula to needs and wants of Indians and keep pulling at their heartstrings. However, you have no clue about the dark secrets of the Indian soul and the hidden wonders of the Indian heart. You leave me with no choice but to deep fry you, you idiot!!”

(source)

I haven’t seen a Bollywood or Hollywood romantic comedy since a long time and I am happy to say that my well-being has really shot up because of it. If one accepts the hard fact that romantic love more or less doesn’t exist in India(even though the symbol of love the Taj Mahal happens to be located in India) and that it’s only an idea which Bollywood uses in order to flourish commercially then life as a young Indian can become easier. Hollywood movies might be better made than the Bollywood ones but they’re just too far removed from India’s social reality. One never sees a Tom Hanks saying to a Meg Ryan, “Sorry Meg, I am a Brahmin and you are a Kadva Patel. I am afraid things cannot work out for us. You’re very sweet but we have to end this here. I know You’ve Got Mail but I’ve Got Caste.”

Are you sure Tom? Really sure? (source)

When Presidents and Prime Ministers in India or abroad have got healthy personal lives or are married and have families(like Nicolas Sarkozy, Manmohan Singh, Barack Obama) rather than single politicians (like Atal Bihari Vajpayee, Narendra Modi) then they inspire a sense of confidence in the public. Similarly, I feel Hindi film artists who have healthy personal lives or are married (like Mani Ratnam) tend to depict Indian life in a balanced way. Film makers and actors like Karan Johar, Aditya Chopra and Salman Khan might have given hits which have a cult following but the public has never heard of them being very happy or stable in their personal lives, no matter what their sexual orientation is. And that’s why I think their movies are overemotional or whacked out when it comes love. If I want to watch a whacked out love story then I would rather go to Ranvir Shorey, Vinay Pathak & Co. or to Jack Black and Ben Stiller. These guys are really out there with their whackiness.  They haven’t been just sitting around Bandra and suburban Mumbai all their lives.

The author’s true love. (source)

If we want the younger generations of Indians to be more clear headed about romantic love then we should stop projecting the idea of romantic love as something exotic but show it as something that is a part of everyday life and easily attainable. This way they can use their energy in doing other interesting things in life too. And women are just women. We give them too much credit by waxing poetic about their bodily features and behavioural qualities .We put them on a pedestal so high that it gets difficult for them to get back on earth. Moreover, the men have to strain their necks just to look at them. (“Hello there, how about a coffee?”. “Yessssss…..”.“Ok let me get a crane first to get you back down on ground”.)

The average Indian male doesn’t have as many romantic choices as his Western counterpart. He cannot or does not usually go to a pub, exchange numbers with a woman and get to know her better. The average Indian male usually goes to the local downmarket bar after a hard day at work and drinks some cheap alcohol. It’s a bar full of men; there is no trace of a woman in that place.

The average Indian man is also the social security for his wife. And not all Indian women are working women. Unless India has a social security system in place like in the West or unless majority of Indian women do jobs he will remain the social security for his women. Since we Indians don’t have a social security system in place, we end up buying a lot of gold or real estate as a compensation to feel socially secure. And that onus is also on the Indian Male. Moreover, until the time he gets married his emotional life is full of emptiness or unrequited loves and fantasies.

In Mary Shelly’s novel Frankenstein, even Frankenstein’s monster is aware of the importance of love in his life. The monster says, “My vices are the children of a forced solitude that I abhor; and my virtues will necessarily arise when I live in communion with an equal. I shall feel the affections of a sensitive being, and become linked to the chain of existence and events, from which I am now excluded.”(p.115) He is devastated when Victor Frankenstein stops making and destroys the female companion and says, “Shall each man find a wife for his bosom, and each beast have his mate, and I be alone?”(p.133)

It is my hunch that the Indian guys who find love (and that’s not very common) are a less violent species than their counterparts who never find love (and not to mention keep watching porn all their life!).However, that statement is debateable and not universally true in India (about both violence and porn!).(However, the last statement doesn’t apply to the guy who is married to a female wrestler or to the guy who is a porn star himself unless he is narcissistic!). And ladies if you had always been looking for a guide to understanding the average Indian man, then I have just spelled it out for you. It is Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein!!!!

The average Indian man. (source)

65% of the Indian population is below the age of 35. Its young people are important to India. And to understand their imaginative, emotional, and physical needs is also important. It can be argued that it is possible to live without romantic love as a lot of young India is doing currently. However, most of us don’t enjoy that sort of a single life. So, either some of us give up the idea of being loved or some of us continue in the tortuous quest for love. From the point of view of human resources also, if romantic love is a deep seated imaginative, emotional, and physical need which it definitely is then it should be satisfied. That would make for well-loved human beings who will go about their work happily and with a sense of fulfilment.

So, this is my message to the average Indian women:
We are Indian men. We watch a lot of Bollywood movies and our heads get messed up by those ideas of love. Real life is a different ball game altogether. The best we can do is make a living, look after you, drink cheap alcohol and ogle at you every chance we get.

I, for one, would love it if we Indian Men get really bored looking at an attractive Indian woman and think, “Oh, just another good looking, well-dressed Indian woman walking down the street. She’s probably dressed nicely to feel good about herself or to attract the best possible male companion. How boring. (‘Yawn’).”

However, that day is not coming anytime soon. So, till then just tolerate us the way we are. And while you’re at it, maybe try to understand us and love us? Even if we don’t sing or dance as well as your Bollywood heartthrobs? What does the average Indian woman have to say?

No harm in trying I guess.

What? Me? Listen!!? (source)

Kartikey Sehgal

This is the working/first poster of ‘Vide’, a forthcoming film in English. The film is about the life of a church musician.

Participants include Manoj G Nigli as director, Kartikey Sehgal as actor and Christopher Masand as music director.

We wish for its sucessful completion.

To sum up this note:

“The future is no more uncertain than the present.“ – said Walt Whitman…

but added that, “The art of art, the glory of expression and the sunshine of the light of letters, is simplicity.”

Kartikey Sehgal

 Here is a gift. Selected works of ‘Father of the Symphony’, Joseph Haydn. These are my selections  from his 106 symphonies. This man made many, many symphonies.

 Music fans have complained that Haydn is boring and ‘repetitive’. He wrote for the court and for  entertainment. He wrote so that the princes and the common man could identify and move along and  not be challenged or shocked. ‘But’ he also composed masterpieces that remind you of the style of  Mozart and Beethoven, who had dedicated their compositions to Haydn. 

 Because he composed a lot and often in speed, you are bound to find repetition if you listen to  everything. My selection of 22 movements have melody, style and grace. I challenge you to find this  selection boring or artistically inedible. 

 Here is the first track from the selection – online. An underrated and ‘unheard’ composition from his  early life. Symphony No 4, Mvt. 2 (Audio only Link).

 Ideally, you will listen to this selection and get back to me. So we can discuss Haydn’s music and talk about the violin strings. This will do good for your music study.

 I have divided the 22 movements into folders of six onto a safe web-sharing depot – mediafire.
Each folder is approximately 20 MB in size to aid listeners with slow internet connections. All files are MP3s. 

It gives me immense pleasure to listen to this selection of fine Haydn music. 
I hope it generates and sustains your interest in western classical music and that you seek more of such music.

Link to Music:

Click to Go to Link

This will take you to a page on mediafire that has links to six folders. Click on each folder to download.

Squadron Leader Anil Sehgal

The author’s face is obscured by Dev Anand’s glass. To the right is composer-singer S D Burman

He was a classmate of our Air Force commander. So, whenever he was anywhere around the place Air Marshal Rajaram was posted at, Dev Anand would invariably make it a point to meet. That is when I met him at ‘Air Force Station Hindon’. Seeing him in flesh, holding a glass of whisky in his lanky hands and cheering to you was a scenario I had never imagined!

Thanks to his friendship with Rajaram, he was a darling of the officers’ mess; there was always a small get-together in his honour. I recall him mingling with the officers affably, cheering each one of them, and always holding a glass of whisky in his hand without finishing a single drink! His visits would always be short, sweet and cheerful.

In 1990, I was posted by the Air Force at Mumbai, which provided me a few opportunities of interacting with him in occasional filmy get-togethers. In 1996, I sought pre-mature release from the Indian Air Force. The following years afforded me greater interaction with Dev Sahib. Many of these meetings were along with friend and journalist Ali Peter John who is a great admirer of the actor.

Meeting Dev Sahib was an experience I will always cherish. He was a bundle of energy, full of enthusiasm for life and great optimism. His very presence was invigorating. He was always lively and his enthusiasm was not only charismatic, it was infectious too.

I recall a day sometime in 1997 when I had to meet Dev sahib at his pad in Pali Hill. That was the day I was feeling feverish and short of energy. So, I rang him up to say that I would like to be excused. “Officer, if you are not feeling bright, that is good enough a reason for you to make it. You must come over. After meeting me, you are bound to feel better!”

He shared a sandwich and some hot tea. We spent about two hours discussing subjects ranging from films, society, and politics to social obligations of a public performer and Lalu Prasad Yadav. He was in his elements and kept me in good humour all through.

By the time I left him, I was feeling energetic, cheerful, and full of bounce with all that feverish feeling gone to the wind! He had rubbed his verve and vitality on me. And that is exactly what happened each time I met him.

He was never patronizing, and by his own example, charmed and inspired me to live life to the fullest extent, irrespective of the hurdles or unfavorable circumstances; never waste time on meaningless social interactions, and do all the things you like if these do not hurt others.

As an actor, he was more youthful than most of our younger crop of actors! Enthusiasm, energy, optimism and joie de vivre are some of the synonyms of Dev Anand.

Death he did not recognize; he believed in living. Even after learning of the death of his dear friend, he always referred to Rajaram as if he had talked to him a short while ago only. That was his zest for life. “Officer, zindagi se badi nemat aur koi nahin hai! Just live it up!” he would say.

Also printed in The Express Tribune

Kartikey Sehgal

My vocals for the song ‘Goriye Ho Meri Raniye Ho’ (alongwith Seema Sehgal) from the album “Tale of a Virgin River”. 
 
Singers: Seema Sehgal & Kartikey Sehgal 
Composed by Seema Sehgal 
Lyrics: Yash Sharma
Arranged by: Sandesh Shandilya
From the Dogri Album ‘Tale of a Virgin River’ 

Goriye ho meri raniye ho by kartikeys

Shaival Thakkar 
(Follows ‘Bong’ed at JNU‘)

“24×7″ food-joint at JNU. 

Apart from these pseudo-Bengalis, there also existed a Delhiite in our batch who claimed to be dying of a serious disease. If he was saying the truth then he deserves all the sympathy and empathy in the world. However, if he was lying (which is probably the case) then he deserves to be punished (like a night or two in jail can really put the hypochondria, the attention-seeking behaviour and the urban loneliness in place). Because all the drama about this disease and death only added to the negativity on campus and seriously affected my well-being and that of my batch mates while he remained comfortable at his off-campus house in Delhi. 

A place like JNU that is supposed to be a safe haven for students and scholars turned into a breeding ground for negativity, bad behaviour and aggressiveness due to such characters. And the Delhi ‘ka paani’ is such that it can even make the nicest and the gentlest of people turn aggressive and manipulative. Although I am generally a mild mannered person, even I harboured revenge fantasies about taking one of our Prime Minister Manmohan Singh’s personal security guards (with whom I am slightly acquainted ,whose number I have and who offered to help if there were any problems in Delhi!) on a weekend to the houses of these hot heads and death-faking johnnies and then make them pee in their pants, crap in their underwear, vomit on their shirt, cough on their ears and other such silly revengeful ( and very unhygienic!) things which Delhiites are famous for saying and doing.

University Pride: Library at JNU   From Photogriefs

If you live in Delhi, you end up speaking Hindi and if you live there long enough, your Hindi improves a lot on its own. So instead of ‘raah’, you say ‘intezaar’ while you’re waiting for something. Your ‘accha’ might turn into ‘badhiya’. And your ‘taklif’ might turn into ‘mushkeel’. So these and many such wonderful Hindi/Urdu words suddenly become a part of your vocabulary. At JNU there was also a healthy population of students from Bihar. And I found that my Hindi also contained inflexions of Bihari. At times, I would end up saying the plural Hum(‘We’) instead of the singular, ‘Main’ (I) while referring to myself. One really cool phrase that I learned from a UP friend of mine is, ‘Aap Load mat Lijye’. Everytime, I or someone around me gets tensed about something, I tell them ‘Aap Load mat Lijye!’.

Back home in Ahmedabad, I had South Indian, Gujarati, Punjabi, Sindhi, Parsi and also a Chinese friend. At JNU, however, people from every region had their own little group and people usually didn’t try much to get out of their regional comfort zone. So according to my experience and to my surprise, Ahmedabad is more cosmopolitan than Delhi! However, in a campus full of students from Bengal, Bihar, Assam, Manipur, Rajasthan, Maharashtra and other states; there were hardly any Gujarati students, which is a bit of a shame. Because having Gujju students in a top academic place like JNU can do a whole lot of good to Gujjuland. 

However, on a lighter note, finally there does exist a place on earth where Gujaratis are very rare. And that is JNU!Some time back, when I read that the centre from where I did my masters in literature was ranked as one of the top 100 English departments in the world, I was really proud of being associated with JNU as a student. I think if we let go off all the pettiness and silly regionalisms then we can go much higher as a university and as a country. However, for that we all have to work together and learn to laugh at ourselves and the places we come from.I am quite an optimist. 

I hope the future will be brighter and the Delhiites and the Bengalis nicer! Bipasha Basu, I hope you’re reading this article!

A silhouette of the Rashtrapati Bhavan (where my security guard friend lives, beware! (Photo: Shaival)

The author does not intend to hurt anybody or any community.

Ananth Venkatesh

I was in a condition of emotionless disquiet on hearing the news of Roebuck’s suicide. When I became acquainted with the events triggering his suicide, my thought immediately revolved around the Hindu/Indian notion of ‘Kali Yuga.’

Eminent cricket writer Peter Roebuck’s suicide in a South African hotel in the paradisiacal city of Cape Town has been a source of copious astonishment for the cricketing society in general, which includes present and historical cricketers as well as writers of the game. Roebuck, whose wordsmithery about cricket was polished, thought-provoking, informative, and learnedwas present in South Africa recently in order to provide coverage for the Australian media of the ongoing exhilarating Test series of cricket between South Africa and Australia.

Suicide of such a prominent observer and communicator of cricket is, in itself, a development that rattles the mental steadiness of cricket followers. But what makes the suicide by Roebuck additionally sordid, unpalatable and tasteless is the circumstance allied to his suicide. Roebuck had been the recipient of an inquisition by the South African police over his supposed participation in an act of coercive carnal strike against the unwillingness of another male, whom Roebuck had supposedly befriended on Facebook. That Roebuck was, apparently, endeavoring to perpetrate homosexuality is not relevant here as that is a matter of personal preference. But what embitters the situation is the accusation of the South African police that Roebuck tried to implement carnal assault on the abovementioned Zimbabwean man despite the refusal of that man. This, of course, is tantamount to legal illegality, which is the source of his inquest by the South African detectives.

Roebuck seemingly couldn’t countenance the inquisitional sessions with the South African police force over his supposed forcible sexual strike on the abovementioned male. He probably deemed that the ramifications of the divulgement of his investigation would be acutely catastrophic for him and his career, which would be equal to an unwholesome public skinning of his personality. Hence, unable to countenance this possibility, he chose the path of suicide.

I was in a condition of emotionless disquiet on hearing the news of Roebuck’s suicide. When I became acquainted with the events triggering his suicide, my thought immediately revolved around the Hindu/Indian notion of ‘Kali Yuga.’ Roebuck’s demise and the bawdy determinant of his demise made my mind an even stronger proponent of ‘Kali Yuga.’ ‘Kali Yuga’ i.e. the epoch of behavioral impiousness, dissoluteness and contamination, is what exists today. Simply eye the case of Roebuck’s decease. ‘Kali Yuga’ also symbolises the capitulation of the civility in human persona to the malicious seductresses linked to behavioral pollution. Roebuck’s case epitomises this too from the looks of it.

The murders of the blameless individuals by their ungodly kith and kin over frivolous issues, promiscuous terrorism mutilating innocents as manifested by the poisons of terrorist outfits, unmitigated carnal crimes (in certain corners of India) committed mostly by persons known to the victims, carnal maltreatment and battering of bodily impaired children, traitorousness, etc. that exist in the world today are reflective of the liquid of malevolence that has seeped into human behavior. These behavioral corruptions in humans have existed ever since the era of the fascinatingly complex ‘Mahabharata’, a vital event in the Hindu/Indian history. ‘Kali Yuga’ has definitely existed since the time of the ‘Mahabharata’ and, perhaps, even before that. As per the accounts of several evaluators of Hindu scriptures, we are living in the ‘Kali Yuga.’

‘CWG Scam’, ‘2G Scam’, ‘Cash-For-Votes Scam’, demonisation of Hinduism that is labeled as ‘intellectual modernity’, sympathising with foxily hideous terror in the name of human rights, persistent vilification of the national armed forces that safeguard our national borders from the toxic fangs of national neighbors, etc. are all embodiments of the ‘Kali Yuga’ in India. This depravity in India today, which can be seen in newspapers and news channels, is in addition to the outright degeneracy that exists in certain quarters of the entertainment community. This degenerateness is provided to the audience here as entertainment, which can only serve as the contaminator and corruptor of the popular psyche here.

Globally also, the genocidal behavior in history commanded by national autocrats such as the Holocaust, the Stalinist genocide in the USSR, the Ottoman extermination of millions of Armenians in the 20th century, etc. suggest the operational efficiency of the ‘Kali Yuga.’ WW 1, WW 2, countless other barbaric international wars, invidious ethnic depopulation, etc. that were features of the 20th century also indicate the potency of the ‘Kali Yuga.’ The wicked ethnic depopulation affected badly the Kashmiri Hindus due to the barbarousness of Islamist terror while ethnic cleansing also bloodied the Bosnian Muslims because of the poisonous zealousness of Christian Serbia. 9/11, the savageness of Islamist terrorism, the gory tribal warfare, horrendous atomization of Japan in August 1945, the nuclearization of certain nations, etc are examples of the hardship and devastation that the belligerence of ‘Kali Yuga’ has caused.

Roebuck was an able English cricketer, who represented the Somerset cricket squad in English county cricket in the 1980s. He had residence subsequently in Australia. His slimy personal past may or may not be revealed in the coming days. But, already, a radio jockey named Gus Worland, who was a younger teammate of Roebuck in the 1980s in the Somerset squad, has stated that Roebuck’s behavior with him was highly unbecoming and unpleasing on one occasion. It is still difficult to accept that Roebuck has been accused of carnal assault. But the assertions of the South African police seem to be based on credibleness. Roebuck seemingly became a prisoner of the perilous deficiency of uncontrollable lustfulness.

So, the belief in ‘Kali Yuga’ continues to grow for me.

Shaival Thakkar

The author talks about his time at Jawaharlal Nehru University (JNU, Delhi) and his fondness for Bengalis.

I am a Gujarati. However, when I hear disparaging things being said about Gujarat or Gujaratis, I am usually on the side of the people who are saying it. We have many faults; we’re too money-minded, profiteering, lack cultural activities, we’re found everywhere in the world (which can be really annoying!). And of course the communal riots of 2002 are a huge shame on Gujarat. Some of us might have heard the music of Richard Marx, some might know about the comedy of Groucho Marx but most of us don’t have an inkling what Karl Marx was all about! Being from a dry state, many of us go completely bonkers over alcohol when we finally find some [Oh my God, Alcohol! (Glug, glug, glug, glug!) Where were you all my life! (Glug, glug, glug, glug!)].Moreover, one really big pain that Gujarat has inflicted upon the world is the singing of Himesh Reshamiya who hails from Bhavnagar!

When I was in Ahmedabad, I was heavily influenced by a family friend of ours who happens to be a Bengali. After hearing his stories about Calcutta, trade unions and Socialism, I used to really look up to the Bengalis. And the same Bengali uncle had a young son, who like many brats of his age was fussy about food. Many times his mother had to mix rice and dal into small balls and feed him in order to get him to eat. Thankfully, he has grown up now and doesn’t throw such tantrums!

So when I went to JNU to get a masters degree in literature, I thought I had left the Gujjus behind in their Gujjuland and had great expectations from Bengalis on campus. However, my experience with Bengalis is such that I divide them into 2 types: 1) The kind, gentlemanly/ladylike, scholarly Bengali and 2) The mean-spirited, ‘naika’ (dramatic), pseudo-Bengali. The second type of Bengali really lives up to the ‘gaali’ part in the ‘Bengali’.

Usually when you mix two cultures, either something really good or something really bad happens. So when you have Bengalis who are brought up in Delhi, either they turn out to be great movie directors like Dibakar Banerjee who made ‘Khosla ka Ghosla’ or, to put it mildly, they turn out to be extremely difficult human beings. By difficult I mean, coming to campus only to party (which is cool), trying every method imaginable to hurt the good people around them (which is stupid), making life as difficult as possible for outstation students( some of whom have gone on to become IAS officers or are on their way to becoming researchers and lecturers). And then running back home to mommy with their dirty laundry, spending the weekend home relaxing and then coming back to spread fresh negativity on campus.

These difficult pseudo-Bengalis were so much in your face that it was tough to get away from them. And so the good people of my batch usually ended up taking them seriously. However, I used to imagine that after they were done spreading their ‘bad boy’ image on campus for the day, they used to go back home and were fed rice and dal balls by their mommies. So that image helped me in not taking them too seriously! Moreover, when it was time to write exams or submit term papers, I have seen them looking very lost and as vulnerable in the library as a deer caught in the headlights. Too bad the aimless testosterone and the misguided machismo can only go so far and not really help with matters cerebral!

Post Script PJs:

Q: Why can the Bengali intellectual never go hungry?
A: The Bengali intellectual can never go hungry because s/he always has a chip on his/her shoulder!

Q: Why can the Gujarati intellectual never go hungry?
A: The Gujarati intellectual can never go hungry because s/he simply doesn’t exist!

Classroom: Location of blood-baths between Shaival and Bengalis

Photos: Shaival Thakkar

The author does not intend to hurt anybody or any community.

In the next story, Shaival will talk about students (minus Bengalis) and other cultural facets of JNU and Delhi.