Santa Singh

Illustration: Kartikey Sehgal

Diwali is time for shy men to become brave hearts. My two friends decided to be generous and give a box of sweets to a girl.

About these two boys: They seldom talk to anybody. One of them is bespectacled and doesn’t tuck his shirt inside his trousers unless there is a formal function. He walks timidly, miles away from girls. The other one is a devotee of his friend. He is tall and lanky and very supportive of all forms of cowardice.

Our bespectacled man, let’s call him B, wanted to wish ‘Happy Diwali’ to the girl. It was an act of immense courage that required immaculate planning. My help was sought and I told him to knock on the door and ask for her. Then give her a small box of sweets and wish her. But B was worried that if the girl’s mother opened the door, then B would be in trouble. B would never have the courage to ask the mother for the girl. He would keep standing until the mother slammed the door on him.

B’s lanky friend suggested that they throw the box through the window. B refused the idea stating that the girl could get injured and curse the boys. The friend suggested that they don’t mention B’s name in the greeting card attached to the box. But then she would never know that B bought it for her.

B told me his desire; he wanted to give the gift but not make it look like he was actually giving the gift. He wanted to appear very casual and natural, like he was just passing by and decided to give sweets to the girl since she saw him. Many plans were discussed but none had the spark B wanted.

Frustration took over. I told B not to go ahead with this idea because it could cause great trouble. He did not listen to me but listened to his libido and asked one of the local cracker-loving boys to help him out. The plan was set.

The local boy, clad in brown shorts and a half-sleeved shirt, crept alongside the floor railing and towards the door. He placed some crackers near the door. Red crackers; they make lot of noise. According to the plan, the boy would burst the crackers and then run. B would be standing at some distance. The girl or somebody would open the door and the boy, fed on 50 Rs, would run away. The girl would then see B who will promptly point towards the running boy. She would see the box of sweets in his hand and surely ask him to come inside. But B would just give the box of sweets to her and immediately leave.

The boy lit one cracker and ran without waiting for it to burst. He dashed across B and across the lanky friend and I; we were standing near the elevator. We could see B standing and scared. The boy had done his job but the crackers won’t burst. The door opened and the girl saw B standing. She waved out and said hello. B didn’t respond. She asked him if he was fine. B didn’t respond. As soon as the girl stepped out, the crackers started bursting. She screamed and ran inside her home. B was too scared to move. A minute later the girl opened the door and glared at B.

“Why didn’t you tell me there were crackers?”

After she slammed the door on him, B walked towards us, dejected and hurt.